Walmart 2 Shannon and lisa 0

Some of you may remember this post. The one where the Walmart parking lot make complete assholes out of my cousin and I. If not, go read it real quick. I'll wait. I'll wait while you change your pants too because you just pissed yourself laughing at us.

Two weeks ago Walmart got us again. Actually technically it was Sams Club. But since that is Walmart and it is attached to it, I'm counting it as fricking Walmart.

So we go shopping for the food for my baby shower. Every single item I bought was either frozen or refrigerated. I was dead tired and just ready to go home. Lisa had drove us there since I didn't have Brandon we only needed one car seat for her daughter and could share a car. We walked out and she so graciously loaded the car for me but kept out her husbands lunch and some nasty lamb chop thingies we had to buy for his friend at work, so we could drop it all off when we were done. I went to get in the car when I suddenly hear, "uh oh, now we're in really big trouble." I looked around wondering who or what could have caused her to say that. That is when I noticed her staring at her closed trunk and that is when I realized her keys were in her closed trunk and that little beepy noise I just heard was her trunk closing.

Uhhh now what?

So I say lets run by your hubbies work and get the spare. NOPE. He doesn't carry one. Okay well what about a house key. SURE! Only, how are we going to get there? Crap, we have a toddler with us, who needs a car seat so we can't just have anyone come get us. We think for a minute and decide my husband will come. No that won't work because he has Brandon and that would use up our car seat. Okay fine then, we will have Rob drop Brandon off to my mom at work, then come get us then take us to Lisa's husbands work then take us home to get my car. Then we will go to her house and get the keys and then we will drive to her car, then I'll take my car and pick up Brandon. NO! To much work. So I call my mom to see if she can just come get us because she has a car seat. DUH. So we stand there waiting for my mom who comes to get us. We drop her back off at work, drive to Lisa's husbands work to get the house key and give him his warm lunch. Get the house key, drive ALL THE WAY ACROSS TOWN to get into her house and get the key and drive all the way back to Sam's Club. She gets in and follows me to my moms work. Her daughter is now asleep in the car I'm in. We then have to get her out, get her in Lisa's car, get me in her car and drive back to my house to hurry up and put all my frozen/defrosted and cold/warm food in the fridge and freezer.

Fucking Walmart!

Doctors doctors doctors

I had my follow up with the perinatologist today. Do you know what he said???

WELL GEE IT LOOKS AS THOUGH NOTHING WAS EVER WRONG IN HERE YOU HAVE HEALED SO WELL.

We'll I'll be damned.

When he put the ultrasound thingy on my belly Codi started wiggling and moving right away. Then the doctor could see him breathing (or whatever babies practice in there) and hiccuping. He said he had plenty of fluid around him and looked super. He listened to the placenta and said it sounded super good. Then he said that when there is a problem with the placenta the baby doesn't get enough oxygen and that is when there is a problem. Right as he did that Codi put up his hand and wiggled all of his fingers back and forth a whole bunch. The doctor stopped and was like oh well that right there tells me everything is okay because a baby with lack of oxygen wouldn't be able to function that well. Then Codi shifted and kicked his little legs a bunch and it was awesome. I never have to go back to that doctor and only have to see my normal OB now!!!!


YAY for Codi!

Drip drop drip drop (aka tmi)

I'm wondering how many holes one person can leak out of at any given time...Here is a look at my weekend.

• I'm leaking from down there, you know the joys of pregnancy. Every time it happens I think I'm either bleeding again or peeing on myself. Really really fun people.
• I'm leaking out of my nose. I went to bed last night with a tissue shoved so far up my nose I think some of it is still there this morning.
• I drool. So this means in addition to my nose tissue I went to bed with a tissue tucked under my mouth to catch the insane amounts of drool that leak from my mouth. This amount triples while I'm pregnant. Thanks for that one God.
• I'm leaking out my boobs. This isn't happening near as often as it did with Brandon (which is just stressing me right out) but that could be because I've had far less sex dreams this time around, and far more, what the fuck was that dream about.

So lets recap. I'm now leaking out of basically every hole in my body but my ears and my ass. And really, if I start leaking out of my ass, well, I think that might just be the end for me. Just lock me in a closet and leave me there till the baby comes. I'm damn sexy here ladies!

SMART ASS

Me: Brandon get out of the closet so we can change your poopy diaper
Brandon: No I playiing
Me: Brandon come on now
Brandon: No I playing

five minutes passes

Me: Brandon you come out right now
Brandon: Ooootay
Me: Brandon come on
Brandon: Walks over, shuts closet door and goes back to playing
Me: Brandon come out
Brandon: Nothing
Me: One.....two... (fyi nothing really happens when I get to three besides me actually going into the closet and grabbing him)
Brandon: Three four fibe six seben eight
Me: Very funny Brandon now come on
Brandon: No I count now
Me: SMART ASS!