Fruit of the Loom

Check out his big boy undies!!!!!

He must be my son

Here is the conversation that just happened.

Two year old runs into room looks right at me and says
Brandon: Tookie mom
Mom: What cookie
Brandon: Chocolate tookie
Mom: We don't have cookies
Brandon: (knowing full well I have a full box of fudge covered mint oreos at my desk says) Tookie MOM oweo chocolate tookie...he then grins opens his mouth as wide as possible and says oweo tookie mom ahhhhhhhhhhh as he opens his mouth again!!!!!!!!

HE MUST BE MY SON!

Why oh why does this shit only happen to me

My son is potty training as you all know. Now. Since my son is BIG BOY he won't have anything to do with those dinky plastic fake toilets you buy for kids. NOOOO he wants to go "potty toilet" So we let him do that for a while and finally got him this tiny Elmo seat that fit over the big seat so he would quit dunking his asshole in the toilet water.

But since my son is all about monkey see monkey do, i.e. if I wear deodorant he wears deoderant, if I brush my teeth and use my hand to put water in my mouth so does he, if daddy wets his hair in the sink, guess whose head goes in the sink and if mom wears perfume you can bet your ass my son will come to work that day smelling like flowers and fruit! Soooo that also means that when he spends a whole weekend with his older cousins who don't use an Elmo seat that my son will now REFUSE to use the Elmo seat.

So now, not only are we dunking our ass back in the toilet bowl cuz he is so skinny, we are also shooting pee out from under the toilet seat right onto mommies cute pink seude flip flops!!!!!!!!

The fun new blog game

Heres the deal. A super secret friend of mine who would like to be known as Sassy, started this new blog. It's called the truth about.... Basically what happens is you go in and finish the ... So far hers have all been about work and the things co workers do to really piss you off. The fun thing about this blog is it is totally anonymous. What she has decided to do, is open up the blog to invite guest authors. You have to come up with your secret agent name to post. Since she wants to remain super secret you will leave your email in my comments and I will give them to her. PLEASE LEAVE THEM ANONYMOUSLY SO WE DONT KNOW WHO YOU ARE! She will add your email and you will receive an invite and be granted permission to blog on the page. Soooo that means if you are having a shit bad day at work and want to secretly vent about that bitch ass ho in the cubicle next to you, you can do it and never have to worry about your job finding out.

The rules are as follows:
All posts will start out with POSTED BY: and your secret agent name
The title shall go as follows: ...and the thing you are telling the truth about..you can see examples from what she has already put up
Cussing is totally allowed.
No real names not even of the people you are writing about
If at any time you figure out who another blogger is you are required to shut your mouth and not out them

After the blog gets up and running you can fill in the blank about anything. It doesn't even have to be about work. Since its totally anonymous you can post the truth about anything, boyfriends, friends, any big juicy secrets you have you can post totally secret and no one can ever vet mad since we don't know who you or the person you are talking about is.

My super secret friend and I think this is going to be great fun. So head over HERE and check out our new little game. Remember if your interested you can simply leave me your email and we will invite you.

NOW PLEASE BE ADVISED. Once you submit your email, in order to sign in you will need a google blogger account. IF the email you send me is connected to your regular blog your secret agent cover will be blown. So if you want to remain ultra mega anonymous then create a second google account with only your secret agent name and a different email that isn't connected to your regular blog GOT IT!

About my twin (my much skinnier much more fashionable twin)

So! Jen and I just started talking again about 8 months ago. We knew each other in high school but we never knew each other well because we were all to caught up in the gossip of life to actually KNOW people! So now as we get to know each other we have found the oddest similarities. Here they are:

• Our bedrooms were (until last week when she redid hers) the same color scheme, a kinda tealish blueish color, and browns.
• We drive the same EXACT care, same year and features and everything
• We are both almost the same far along in our pregnancies
• We are both having boys
• Both our kids will probably have names that start with "C"
• We both type on little white Mac Books
• We both prefer to shop at the organic stores and cook fresh meals
• We are registered for the same stroller
• We both have bent pinkies
• Our moms so far seem like the same person just split in two
• We were both ultra spoiled
• We both still are
• We both married non confrontational guys
• We both have cats
• We both had out door weddings
• We both have a thing with bags!!!!
  

This is all that comes to mind right now..but it saddens me that I've found someone who is so much like me and now she is gone in another state!

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING???

Rewewol! That is what Brandon is repeating to me OVER AND OVER AND OVER! What in the fuck is he telling me? He is getting sadder and sadder as he says it because I can't figure it out. On top of that he doesn't seem to want to point it out or take me to it either so I'm stuck here just trying to guess. Lets see, it is none of the following:

• Nothing on TV
• Milk
• Blocks
• Chair
• Hungry
• Red
• Yellow
• Balloon

What on earth is this kid saying. I hate hate hate when I can't figure out what he is saying. Usually when he does a new word I can see the new thing around us to figure the word out. Not this time though. He spent the night at my parents this weekend with his older cousins and between those four people he learned some very interesting things but I'll be damned if I know what rewelowl means!

It is so frustrating watching him try and tell me, and it's more frustrating because in return he doesn't understand me back when I say, Honey I don't know what you are telling me. Soooo we then spend the morning going back and forth not understanding a word the other one is saying!

Why don't these things come with little tiny translators who sit on their shoulder like a talking parrot hmmm?

Why why why why why?

I just don't get it. Why on earth do people have Myspace accounts if they are just going to set them to private? It is fucking retarded. To use the excuse that you don't want people to know what you are doing is even more lame. If you don't want them to know THEN DON'T FUCKING WRITE IT, Right? But really, I don't get it. How much info can one person really have on their Myspace? It's like blogging, you either use a pseudo name or you just don't write what you don't want people to know? Sounds easy enough doesn't it? Quite frankly the private blogs get me irritated too. I think I'm so bothered by this because when you make the effort to find an old friend or something and then can't even check out their pictures to make sure it is really them, it really sucks that you even tried. Uggggg. Don't have a Myspace if you have soooo much to hide!