The return of the lacy Bra PEOPLE

Guess what happened this morning. I woke up played with my son, watched some TV, made some coffee, brushed my teeth AND PUT ON MY OLD LACY BRA. Thats right people I said Lacy Bra. Its yellow with pink lace flowers on it and quite raunchy but sweet if I do say so myself. I'm torn between missing my nursing boobs and wanting to jump for joy over being able to wear a bra again. It is out of sheer respect for my readers (yes all five of you) that I do not post pictures of me prancing around in my bras.

Some background here. I don't remember the last time I wore less then a D size bra. This is a little annoying because unless you are a size 0 with a D cup then the bra people generally don't make anything but big-ole-ugly-white-plain-cotton-strap em in and tie em down-old lady bras. So it has actually been close to 5 yeas since I could buy a bra for anything more then function. Since getting pregnant I have been stable at a DD and that was small coming off the first nursing boob phases making me somewhere close to a FFFFFF size. So about two months ago I get it in my head that maybe I could move on from nursing bras and buy some that will at least push the girls up and make me feel somewhat like a female. It worked beautifully. Nevermind they were plain white and black bras they still made my boobs and my stomach become two different areas. While at the store I threw this beautiful C cup bra in my car in hopes that someday I would be able to wear it.

SOMEDAY IS HERE PEOPLE. Although I'm sad that my girls have now shrunk down to measly little C cups I am thrilled to be prancing around in my lace bra. Today is going to be a good day because as we all know, when you have on nice underwear your whole day is instantly better. If you did not know that I advise you to rush out to the nearest pantie sale (gap recently sold panties for .97) and buy yourself one nice matching lacy bra and pantie. Put it on under your normal jeans and T-shirt and I promise your day will be awesome because you will have your own secret. Under your boring old jeans and T-shirt you are a fabulous lingerie model and no one else gets to know.

I am actually pretty sad about losing my girls. I no longer get to walk around and refer to my..
Big guzungas
Girls
Gianormous boobs
Melons
Jumbo Wumbo's

Okay people we have a poopoo issue here

Okay so I know a while ago I blogged about not nursing anymore. What I don't know is why no one warned me what happens to your kids poop when he isn't getting breast milk anymore.

**Things that have changed since nursing stopped**
*Poop quantity went from one a day to three a day
*Nice round little poop turned to hot steaming liquid gooey poo
*Poo that used to stay in diaper is now smeared all over babies but in yellowish drippy fashion and oozing out of diaper
*Mom has gone from calm and collected super diaper changer to, gagging, poo covered sweaty rushing freak


**Things that have not changed since nursing stopped**
*BABY STILL LOVES TO STICK HANDS IN POO

Soo here I am ladies left with a baby who as soon as I undo the velcro diaper straps immediately reaches hands inside to swirl them in his poo. This leaves me to freak out and try holding both legs up while holding both hands and still managing to wipe hot stinky mess from his butt. When does it end people when will the poop madness end?