Things someone told me..

I shit you not, you all want to know why I'm so screwed up, here you go.

Things someone told me, and meant them.

• When I was nine months pregnant running to walmart at 7 at night....You better be careful someone might kidnap you and cut out your baby and leave you for dead. Thanks for that one.
• You better not leave your purse in the car, the whole world is fucked up so someone is going to steal it from you.
• You know Armageddon is coming soon so you are going to see your son die.
• Chocolate gives you pimples
• Nothing lasts forever so don't get too attached to that husband of yours.
• Your young, if you get divorced everyone will just think its normal since getting married young is something stupid kids do and adults laugh at.
• Rub the Vicks on your sons back because it seeps in through his skin and thats how it works, NEVERMIND IT IS CALLED VAPOR RUB!
• Writing on yourself in class is slutty, BUT cutting the ass out of your jeans is totally normal.
• Its better to be a badass then to be liked.
• Even if you just got a 60.00 dinner free, you shouldn't be happy because you could have gotten more.
• My New Years resolution is to take no shit from anyone thats why I can be a bitch.
• You fuck up everyones life you ever meet or get involved with (this was all brought on because I wouldn't go ask Ben Affleck for his signature while he was eating, since I thought this was very rude, Your welcome Ben)
  
• You and your cousin are Cunts (this happened because we wanted to stop at garage sales before going to the company picnic)
• I wish I had killed myself instead of your dad, that way you would care about me like you care about him.
• Catholics are all fucked up, you shouldn't believe in God.
  

I'm going to have to stop now before I get more mentally fucked up then I already am.