No regrets

You know I have to say I'm shocked at all of you. I really expected at least one person to question me having my tubes tied. I was totally stunned when no one tried to question me. Whoah. Anyway this time I know that I did the right thing. You know, when I had Brandon I would always walk around saying, "with our next kid..." or "next time", or "if we have a girl." This time however there is no next time. Not because I can't, but because I just know I'm done. You see as many times as I sat there saying I WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER CHILD, after Brandon, a part of me always knew I was lying. I saved all his clothes, I saved all his gear, because deep down inside I knew I was the biggest liar ever on this earth and my pants were so far on fire they might as well have just turned to ash. I knew I wanted just one more. I knew I really wanted that one more to be a boy. While I joked about pink and pony tails and dolls and frills, deep down inside I somehow knew I was going to have two little boys and be done. So I had my tubes tied and I'm happy. While I know I'll never sit there saying, wow I wish I had another, I know there are other things that will seem weird. I know it will be totally weird never thinking, OMG am I pregnant every time I throw up or have a weird symptom. It will be weird knowing Rob and I can free willy it all we want and nothing can ever happen. I honestly think that part of it will be a huge adjustment. Sort of like this last pregnancy was an adjustment. I was so prepared for an uphill battle that when I got pregnant like over night I didn't know what to do with myself. Thats how I think this will feel. I don't know what I will do with out having to think about condoms first, or birth control or the oops he was too drunk to pull out. I mean, really do you know how strange it will be to have no responsibility? Shit, this is going to be like high school all over again!