Kat's questions

How many times do you have to pee now on average?
Well! This totally depends on how tired and lazy I am. At any given time I have to pee ALWAYS, however, if I'm feeling particularly lazy I will hold it until it hurts and then go running like a three year old to the bathroom with my legs half crossed trying not to pee on myself. At night, I also try and hold it which results in me waking up only about 5 times as opposed to every single damn hour. That is five times if you don't count the two times I go right after I get in bed, get comfy and then realize that FUCK I HAVE TO PEE AGAIN!

Has the little munchkin stopped rubbing your bladder?
NO! Although his kicks are not quite bruise worthy lately the little shit hasn't slowed down on the beating the shit out of his mom and stroking my bladder as though he was already a teenager fondling a girls boobies!

And will you obey your doctor and lie down some more?
Hi! Have you met me? I have a two year old. His idea of mom laying down means, "Yay time for big time wrestling let me go ahead and body slam mom." Don't think he's not to mean to go all Hacksaw Jim Dugan on my ass and beat me with a board either. He loooves to pull out random hidden pieces of wood and whack me with them! Also, I can only lay on my left side, and when I lay that way on the couch I'm near the place where he threw up last week, and although I cleaned it, I haven't had time to get the people out to shampoo my couch so I'm totally ooged out by laying there. And finally, if I'm laying down then who is dusting my bedroom, washing the sheets and sliding around on my new hardwood floors hmmmmmm?