Oh shit

Let me just say some of you are doing an excellent job of keeping me amused. This is the latest post by Weekday Wisdom that had me laughing my ass off. I encourage you all to visit her site.

Maury's job isn't on the line... at all!

I think about the numerics of my family a lot, like how many brothers-in-law I have named 'Kyle' (2) and how many sisters-in-law named 'Chelsea' (2). Last week I tried to figure out how many nieces and nephews I have. A year ago I had 24. I think I have 29-ish now. It's hard to keep track of all of those Kaedyns, Kadens, Cades, Aidens and Calebs, and when some family members breed like hamsters, I can't sort them all out in my mind.

About two years ago, my sister in California, Lilly, had her first baby. When she came in to town with Jacob, my step-mom insisted on getting all of the grand babies together for a picture. When I saw the picture, there was a strange chubby baby in it that I'd never seen before. I figured someone was probably babysitting another child, and they'd thrown him in the picture so he wouldn't feel left out. A few days later, I went to see my step-mom for Mothers Day. As I was sitting in the living room chatting with my family, my brother walked in with a girl I went to high school with. In her arms was the chubby baby from the picture. It all made sense. Jim was dating a girl with a baby. That is, until Anna explained to me that the baby was Cade, Jim's son.

What?!?

Yep, my brother had a six-month-old son I'd never heard about. Apparently there was a drunken date, a paternity test, and I was a proud new/old aunt and no one in my family thought I was important enough to know.

Fast forward to March 2007. Since Anna became pregnant, she's been staying at home. She only lives five minutes away from me, so she stops in every now and then. One day she mentioned something about Jim going to court because Cade bit Aiden, and Aiden's mom was pressing charges.

"Who's Aiden?"I asked.

"Jim's other son," Anna informed me.

What!?! Another one?

It gets worse!

Anna explained to me that Aiden is three years old! THREE YEARS OLD! Cade is also THREE YEARS OLD. Something is very wrong with the whole scenario. Could it be that Cade and Aiden are only three months apart in age? Or could it be that Cade's mom and Aiden's mom were BEST FRIENDS when these children were conceived???

Then Anna told me that there's a little girl out in the world somewhere who might be Jim's daughter.

My brother is sick! See why I say 29-ish?