You give a monkey an inch, and he takes the whole thing!

So Ginger and I were just sitting here chatting. Apparently Brandon was upset we weren't paying attention to him!

Look, I got all of my toys out of my toy box...

Ha ha you didn't stop me...Plus I'm really cute

And look! This is my belly!

More bout pets

Forgot I had a bunny that I named Hopper. He was cute. I loved him. He was a he until he had a crap load of baby bunnies who would get out of their cage and dig little burrows in the ground. I had chickens and ducks for a while and their babies used to get lost in the baby bunny burrow holes.

Okay so Lindz asked why I had so many pets. Well! We have always just loved animals, so as long as I can remember we have always had between 2 & 4 cats and at least two dogs. When I was little we lived on this big property and since I was a pain I convinced my parents to build me a big huge giant fenced area and they dug me a pond and that is where we kept the bunnies, chickens, ducks and the rooster.

I also forgot the Mastif puppy my ex and I had, we named him Hooch because he was almost like the dog in Turner and Hooch.

Now that I've moved out I only have Meister and my mom only has Catalano and her two dogs so we are doing better on the pet quota!

Who would ever let me name a child

So I was just over reading Cakerwakers and she was talking about her pets. I must admit some of their names were pretty funny, a dog named puppy and a cat named kitty. It got me thinking about some of my pets names and how they came to be.

The first ones I can remember were Pebbles and Bam Bam.
Pebbles- She came first, I must have been maybe about 4 and I was pretty into the Flinstones at the time.
Bam Bam- He was Pebbles baby so at the time this made perfect sense, although now that I think about it, Pebbles and Bam Bam were more like cousins then mom and baby....hmmmmm.

Catalano- Ahhhh he was named after Jordan Catalano on My So Called Life. Because, he was LIKE TOTALLY THE CUTEST BOY IN THE WORLD! Plus, Catalano had the word cat in it, so I thought I was being extra clever...Not so much

Henry- This was the Beagle dog I had for a few weeks. He was named after Tom Henry the guy I had the HUGEST crush on, and I some how thought that if I named my dog after him he would like me more....That worked huh? NOT!

Fefe- I so did not name this one, she came with that name so I can't held responsible for her poor name

Fluffy- Wait, again I didn't name that one.

Peanuts- He wasn't even supposed to be our cat. We bought him for our grandma and when we took him there she wasn't home so he ended up living with us. I named him peanut because he was an orange cat which to a 3rd grader, orange is totally the same color as a peanut huh! Right? I'm not color blind I swear.

Ranger- This was my lab he was brown. When we picked him up we drove our old ford ranger which was dark brown. On the glove box it said Ranger on it. I thought it made perfect sense brown dog Ranger & brown truck Ranger. Can you see how clever I really am?

Meister. Short for Jagermeister. This one is easy I used to be an alcoholic!

Listy List

Meals eaten today.....3
Snacks eaten today.....2
Deserts eaten today....1
Times puked today......2
Times puke tasted like Mexican....2
Times son had a melt down....786689
Times Brandon went to time out.....6

Hows that now????????

So, that previous post titled oad to Eggos. I DON'T REMEMBER WRITING THAT TITLE! Am I losing my mind, or did some one hack in and title my blogs?

Ode to Eggos

For as long as I can remember I have love Eggos. Not waffles, strictly the frozen Eggo waffles. After I discovered I was gluten free I became extra hesitant to try all that weird gluten free stuff. In fact my mom bought me the bread and the first thing I did was make everyone else taste it. The look on their faces combined with the instant gagging and vomiting told me I wasn't going to try it. Then one day my mom brought me some gluten free frozen eggo like things. I gave em the eye, checked em out, stared em down and tried em. If I cooked it till it was crispy (like an eggo) it was delicious. Now however, I AM ADDICTED TO MY GLUTEN FREE EGGOS smothered in butter and boysenberry syrup! Crap! All I want to do is eat my frozen waffles all day long. Could this be a pregnancy craving?

Not my favorite part of the day

So that pregnancy thing happened to me today. You know that one where you realize you are hungry, and if you don't eat in .5431niner seconds you are suddenly famished and find yourself shaking and starving to the point where you think you might actually melt away. Your muscles start hurting immediately because your so hungry your body is already starting to eat your muscles and you know soon you will be nothing but a pile of skin on the floor. That is, if your stomach doesn't start eating the skin because you are so hungry. Then, you immediately start eating everything in sight to try and curb the hunger only eating seems to just make you hungry. After this point, for the rest of the day you realize you are now a bottomless pit and no amount of food is going to fill the hole you created in this pit now called the baby making machine! You spend your day telling yourself this better be one big ass baby because damn they are eating a lot and sucking me dry.

Sigh!

Some Tuesday randomness

First of all, a lot of you are commenting on the fact that I am pregnant and I wasn't wearing a bra the other day. See, when I wear a bra, my boobs feel great its the second I take it off that I wanna crawl in a hole and die. However, since I spent about 19 months or so wearing a bra every night (I started while I was pregnant since I had so much milk leaking I needed to wear pads during pregnancy) I really really don't want to have to start sleeping in a bra again until I absolutely have to. Also, once the bra is off and they are just hangin there on their own, they really don't hurt since they aren't perky and don't move around much any more. They sort of just sag their on their own. Second, as I clearly stated I was in my jammies. As in the same jammies I had been wearing since about ooo I don't know FRIDAY night and I did put on a bra the one time I did leave the house but it came right off as soon as I got home, since all I really did Sunday was eat, nap, pee, nap, eat, pee and well, nap! And really, who can nap with a damn bra on?

Also Julia finally came out of the baby closet and is telling the world she is pregnant. So here you go, read about her here. I can't believe it because we are only a few days apart. Julia is having what is called a post deployment baby. Which means she got pregnant right after her husbands deployment was over. This makes me wonder, how full exactly the base hospitals are 9 months after a return from deployment! I am so excited for her, because she had the longest year waiting for her hubby to come back from secret classified places. She will soon be moving from Germany to Reno and will only be about 3 blocks from my house!

Last night I peed 4 times. Yes you read that right FOUR! times in one freaking night. As in 4 times from 8:32pM until 5:30AM. Dammit, I got no sleep.

Still no more puking though, so you won't catch me complaining about that. I get a little nauseous around 4PM but that is about it.

Yesterday I had a huge craving for a hot dog, but I didn't have any veggie dogs, or real dogs so I just pouted about it. Last night I craved some good vegetable soup from a can. Only problem is, THERE ARE NO GOOD VEGETABLE SOUPS THAT ARE GLUTEN FREE IN A CAN. This meant I had to suck it up and make a soup. Damn I am a good cook. The shit turned out so good I would have eaten the whole pot if I didn't get full after one serving. It was so good Brandon even liked it.

I forgot to weigh in on the first so I did this morning. I was 164 with sweats on. That isn't bad at all considering I don't think I've eaten less hen 5000 calories a day in the last week. No that isn't an understatement if you realize that just for breakfast the other day I had 1000 calories, then for second breakfast i had about 1500 from burger king, then I threw in three donuts for good measure and then some thai food, and then sushi....yeah I'm doing great on my diet people. Well, great if I was a skinny person trying to get fat! On the bright side the baby doesn't seem to mind one bit that I am eating all this shit!

O right, another little craving. I have been craving lemonade. Only, I crave it until I drink it, but then I hate it, and five minutes later I crave it again. Thats always fun.

The Easter egg hunt is Saturday and I am so excited I can't even contain myself. I got Brandon the most ridiculously embarrassing outfit I could. The outfit is complete with, blue seersucker pants, a matching blue and yellow pinstripe button down shirt and easter egg yellow sweater vest. Oh yes people, my son will hate me when he is 10 and I'm still making him wear this shit to the egg hunts. However, I earn cool points for getting him a super awesome Super Man easter egg basket. Since he can walk this year, he will be the shit at egg hunting and is going to totally kill your kids on who gets the most eggs. I have already taught him to kick, punch and scratch his way to the eggs! Beware moms, my sons meaner then yours!

I keep getting asked if I want a boy or a girl. To be honest I have no clue. This time when I was pregnant with Brandon, I already knew I was having a boy because I dreamt of him, plus I JUST KNEW! This time however I HAVE NO CLUE! No dreams, no give aways (like excessive puking) nothing. And, on the puking note, during my pregnancy with Brandon all I kept hearing was that puking was a good sign meaning the baby was healthy. So as much as I hated puking I can't help but wonder, if my lack of puking means this baby is going to be less healthy? Back to the gender thing. I honestly have no clue if I want a boy or a girl. On one hand, I would love a girl to be girly with and dress up and vomit up pink girlyness with. On the other hand I think darn, I have no girl stuff, I already have a boy room and boy clothes and so on. Plus I would love for Brandon to have a baby brother so they can rough house and play together and be life long pals. So I am really kind of torn. With Brandon I knew I wanted a boy. In fact had they said it was a girl I think I would have been a little disappointed. However, this time I think I will be ecstatic either way. My check book would be happier if it was a boy, and so would the majority of my family. My husbands family would much more prefer a girl, since there are like NO GIRLS AT ALL in that family!

Ummm lets see what other randomness I can spew out! Oh right, Steph is coming to the Easter egg hunt with us, since Rob will be out of town and I will need some sort of back up against all the other mothers after my son totally annihilates their kids on the grass! You think I'm bad now, wait till my son starts playing sports. I'll be that mom that gets in fights with other moms in the bleachers when their son hits my son with a baseball or just because their son sucks and I will feel inclined to shout that he is a crybaby wussy boy who hits like a girl...Yeah that will be me. Future T-ball moms in Reno, I apologize in advance for all the shit I'm going to start at the games. My husband said his mom wasn't allowed to come to games anymore after she started running up and babying him when he got hurt. That will also be me. I am fiercely protective over my little baby. So first I will run over and cuddle him publicly mom cooties and all, then I will go punch whatever little boy hurt my little boy, that, or I'll send my other kid to kick that kids ass so I don't go to jail for harming a child.

I will also be that mom screaming out tired old cheerleading chants during the games like,

NUTS AND BOLTS NUTS AND BOLTS WE GOT SCREWED!

Oh yeah, I'm not even scared to pull that one out. Plus if I have a daughter I will probably have to be her cheer leading coach, because cheer leaders are awesome, and I was totally like the best cheer leader there like ever was. Well, when I wasn't busy making out with the football team, or watching guys kick the shit out of each other, or off on a date. Yeah when I wasn't doing all that I was a pretty damn good cheer leader. LIKE! TOTALLY!

Wait just remembered two more great camp cheers,

Mayonnaise, mustard Ketchup (to be sang when some little boy is dragging his ass and needs to catch up to the rest of the all starts)

And

Hamburgers, hot dogs, hurry those buns (also sang to the slacker jack ass on the team who is afraid to run a little )

Oh yeah, I'm a great parent huh!

PHATSO PHOTOS WEEK 6 (we are in pregnancy weeks now)

Okay. I am going to swallow my pride here and take the damn photo. Here are the rules for photo viewing.
1. You cannot comment on the fact that I am so white I look as though I'm related to Casper the Ghost.
2. You cannot comment on the stretch marks that are already their from my pregnancy with Brandon.
3. You really cannot comment on the fact that I look like one of those people who lost 100 pounds and now has a body full of saggy skin to show for it.
With all of that said, I give you my first belly shot.

**P.S. No, I'm not wearing a damn bra, yes those are my jammies, and I'm not entirely sure if I brushed my hair today! Take it as it is people.

Huh, not so sure if I should

So a friend of mine (who will remain nameless until she announces to the world on her own that she is pregnant) is pregnant with me. She is actually about 5 days less pregnant then me we are guessing. Anyway she is already doing belly shots. Problem is, she has this great flat belly so she can do that kind of thing. If I were to lift my shirt and show my belly right now you would all think I was possibly already 5 months pregnant rather then only 5 weeks. Even though I lost a lot of weight, I didn't lose enough to be flashing my belly around just yet. In fact I'm nervous to even flash it at all until about 9 months. Not to mention, this child has already caused me to gain back about 7 pounds (NO JOKE) since I can't seem to give up bread and sweets, which is something I wasn't eating at all for a long time. The odd thing is the bread isn't bothering me near as much as it did. It still bugs me, but not enough to convince me to quit eating bagels, donuts, and sandwiches.

In other baby news, I finally got sick on Friday. Not just a little sick, but sick as in, I threw up all of the things I had eaten that day, which was A LOT since I ate everything I had craved. The worst part is it was while we were having dinner at a VERY NICE Thai restaurant. Its the kind of place where if you don't roll up in an Audi, BMW, or Lexus you will get dirty looks from the other cars in the lot. Imagine that, some hoity toity high falooting placy, and I puke ON! THEIR! BATHROOM! FLOOR! Yeah you read that right. The first time, I made it in the toilet. The second time, not so lucky, all over their beautiful tile floor. (Sorry Thai restaurant)! Oh wait, as thought I haven't grossed ya'll out enough. I chose to eat some extra spicy red curry red chilli sauce stuff, and let me tell you, when I threw up it came out my nose, and I'm pretty sure the spice went right ahead and singed off any nose hairs that may have been in my nose!

Hope you enjoy the mental visual. Have a nice day!