We're having chicken for dinner

I just posted a couple great chicken recipes over on the food blog. Hop on over and see!

Looking for a few good Girl Scouts

So I'm still here. I'm done dying. I'm just, ummm, kinda flopping around like a fish out of water but definitely not dying. I went to the doctor finally for some drugs and it went like this.

Doctor: Okay so you are wheezing, have a terrible cough and for sure need some antibiotics. So here have some Augmentin.
Me: Okay
Doctor: How about some cough syrup with Codine? Nope never mind your nursing. How about something for your vertigo, let me check.
(Checks THREE different drugs and finds that no I can't take fucking any of them)
Doctor: Wow that is pretty sad, life sucks for you right now. Hmmm, I can't even give you an inhaler for the wheezing. This is terrible. First you have to be pregnant and now your nursing which makes you stuck being able to take nothing.
Me: Yeah tell me about it huh.
Doctor: Okay aha this pill says it is safe, but it has a very low rate of working for vertigo, but it's only $4.00 so why the hell not try it.
Me: Sounds promising thanks!

I came back to work only to find out Codi has what I had. Since he is a boy that obviously means he is the most whining, sad, angry, MAN about this whole thing. Seriously, I can see the Rob coming out in him with this one, because y'all my husband realllly goes all out when he is sick with the whining. If Codi keeps it up I will need to call the whambulance soon.

In other news I'm doing great with my fitness and diet goals already this year. However, I'm smart enough to ask in advance WHERE THE FUCK ARE ALL THE GIRLSCOUTS! Seriously. What happened to the days when girls would come knock on your door and sell cookies. None of my employees have kids either. Okay not true, one has like 17 kids but his wife is too lazy to do something like put her kids in Girl Scouts, which means I HAVE TO SUFFER PEOPLE AND I GET NO COOKIES!

So. My dear readers do any of you have girls selling cookies? If so I will totally paypal you some money for them. I need about 6 boxes of Thin Mints (seriously I freeze them) and then some of the other new fangled kinds. I swear if you guys tell me that none of you are selling cookies, well I'm going to kick some ass. I sooo don't have the patience to wait for them to be on sale outside the store this year. Plus last year they totally put two different troops outside. One when you walked in and one when you walked out. Which meant you either had to buy from each of them or disappoint two groups of girls. I got suckered a lot last year.

Also totally unrelated. The other night at about 3am Codi woke up and projectile vomited in my bed. Rob changed the sheets while I changed Codi and took his temperature. Later, we got back in bed. Rob had put my 600 thread count Egyptian Cotton sheets on. He leans over and says, "I kind of liked the flannel ones, they were warm." SO, I know my kid was sick and all but at that moment I swear all I was thinking was "I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO I WIN I WIN YOU LIKE MY SHEETS SUCK IT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I WAS RIGHT NEENER NEENER YOU LOVE MY SHEETS." What I replied was, "I know they are nice huh." But I swear my head was screaming the whole time that I HAD WON! The next day he went so far as to text me to ask if I had washed the sheets because he "missed" the flannel ones! There might have been an I win dance when I received that text!

So to sum up. I'm still sick, my child has morphed into a whiney sick monster demon spawn, I would like to order Girl Scout cookies from anyone ordering them, and I WIN!

*I realize it is not yet Girl Scout season, I'm just putting in my request in advance.

Budget friendly cooking

I posted some great tips for budget friendly cooking along with a recipe over on the tasty blog. Check it out. Last nights stuffed shells recipe was part of this weeks meals that make more then one! Here is the link.

To clarify for Angie

Angie and I were chatting tonight and I feel the need to clarify. I don't swallow the shit I cough up simply because I'm to much of a lady to hock a loogie I REALLY REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW. I physically can not do it. Instead I make a weird gagging choking noise and then swallow the junk in defeat. I assume, it is because I was too much of a lady back in the day to figure it out. Either way it drives me goddamn bonkers!

Hungry?

Sausage stuffed shells

Vegetarian spinach stuffed shells

Still here...still dying

I just arrived back from an over night trip to San Francisco. It was supposed to be a two night trip however we left a day late due to the DYING THING! Our plan was to leave yesterday at 8am. So, at 8am I rolled out of bed. At 8:01 am I rolled back into bed and pretended I was not awake. I finally dragged my ass downstairs. I came down and laid down next to Rob on the couch whining. He informed me it was time to get ready. So I marched right upstairs and got back in bed. Rob = not impressed. I laid there while he packed and then after her gave me a look that said, "get your shit together now woman" I got up, snuck into the guest bedroom and got in that bed!

After 10am we finally left.

I spent most of the time in San Francisco laying on the futon pouting about my terrible vertigo, and gagging. Every time I cough it makes me want to puke. The vertigo feels similar to being drunk off vodka. Because being drunk off vodka is much different then, say, wine. It feels kind of like I'm a ticking crash bomb waiting to happen. Meaning at any second I'm going to crash into a wall, or a chair, or....a Christmas tree.

I also spent a good amount of time fixated on one a half hairs I forgot to shave. Not just this once either, I've obviously forgotten to shave these bad boys for a good month or so. One of them I must have half shaved about 3 weeks ago because it is just a weeeee bit shorter. SEE! FIXATED.

This morning I woke up and remembered that I can't hock a loogie. Which is all fine because I am a lady y'all. However, when I'm sick, and I wake up and cough up some shit because I'm such a lady I have no choice but to swallow it because home girl don't know how to hack that shit up! Instead, I cough and cough some more, till I choke on it. Then, of course I swallow it and then get a look on my face like....well, like someone who just swallowed a fucking loogie!

We drove home and in an effort to keep Rob awake we played taboo from my cellphone. It was a lot of me saying, "okay babe it's like that thing, that's, you know (insert hand gesture here)." Which led him to say, "I'm driving I can't see you." So obviously I would just shove my hands closer into his face and say "LIKE THIS!"

Describing Dennis Rodman (can't say basketball, his team name, nose ring or...something else)
Me: He's that gay bouncyball player who was married to Carmen Electra
Rob: Bouncy ball?
Me: Yes
Rob: Who was married to her, he's gay?
Me: Well he's something, but he ain't straight...he's ummm, got one of these (points to nose ring)
Rob: Oh oh oh um uh ooo ooo ooo
Me: Umm, it is like your name with a "D"
Rob: Dod, dod, dob, bod,
Me: ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW
Rob: oooooo Rod
Me: Yeah and your another word for a guy
Rob: Rodman Rodman yeah RODMAN shit whats his name
Me: It's like your Uncle
Rob: (names every uncle but the one named Dennis)
Me: Are you really fucking serious?
Rob: OOooo Dennis Rodman...oh yeah he is sooo not straight.
Me: That took to long.

Or, describing "Special Olympics"

Me: OO OO IT'S SOMETHING YOU COULD DO
Rob: Be amazing
Rob: Be awesome
Rob: Be the best
Me: NO Umm, there's these five little ring things
Rob: I soooo could not be in the Olympics
Me: You could be in this kind
Me: You know, think, like important
Rob: THE SPECIAL OLYMPICS...THAT'S NOT NICE!
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Anyway we are home now. I'm still dying. To make things better I'm also on my period. So I'm dying and hemorrhaging all at once. I feel like I have a mixture of the flu with a side of DEATH ON TOAST. I said that this morning while eating Robs aunts pancakes and she asked me if that meant I wanted toast?

Did I tell y'all that I puked on myself the other night? Yeah. I was peeing and realized I had to pee. I reached over and grabbed the trash but I vomited so much and so fast I puked more on myself then in the trash. All over my clean new pants, my socks, the toilet mat, the floor, the toilet, the cabinets and the trash. Can you believe I missed that bad? It was so embarrassing. I went into the bathroom fully clothed and came walking out in nothing but my underwear and shirt. Rob probably thought I shit myself or something. I told him later how I puked on myself and he said he's never done that, he usually turns around and just pukes in the toilet. I almost died. Could you imagine, you just went potty, then you turn around and puke and the potty water splashes out on you? OH HELL NO! Especially because I know men only sit when they poop. Oh yeah I'm going to make myself sick in a minute.

Needless to say this week has not been good. Also I don't know how many more times I can go potty without Rob figuring out that I might be (pooping). He asked me the other day if I was and I replied " I WILL SO NEVER EVER EVER TALK TO YOU ABOUT POOPING!

So, if my husband asks I'm just going pee a lot okay!

The stroller that is no more

Forgive me for my lack of posting. I'm stuck at home sick, with a whining sick husband, a sick toddler and a destructive one year old. With out further ado I present the story of the stroller that is no more.

I have a lot of strollers. My favorite stroller is my Jeep jogging stroller. However, it is a little bulky for my trunk so I purchased one of those junky umbrella strollers because it was the smallest thing I could put in my car. That broke so I went looking for something else. I bought this Baby Trend. It folded small, had trays and a nice compartment under it. I used it for a long time. After Codi was born I decided to look for something small that would fit in Robs Honda trunk. I purchased this Graco (in brown). That stroller was the worst ever. The seat didn't sit up all the way and the wheels kept locking up. I received a free cheap umbrella stroller and we used that instead. I had always wanted a double stroller but for one reason or another I didn't buy one. I would tell myself, "I made it this far with out one I don't need it." Of course then I would encounter another moment where I found myself cursing my idiot self for not buying the fucking stroller. Once I went to the store and had it in the cart and everything but couldn't do it because I thought it was too much money to spend on a stroller that I probably would never use anyway. That very night I found myself at Hot August Nights with two kids and only one stroller. Like always my three year old was crying that he was tired and he wanted in the stroller. How about the time I found myself on a walk around the mountain with Codi in the stroller and Brandon tired and whining to get in. He wanted in so bad in fact that the poor little guy ended up trying to climb in the little basket underneath and ride down the hill. In the end Ginger had to tempt him with a race to get him down the hill with out screaming. Again, I stood there kicking myself for not buying a double stroller, alas, I stuck with my cheap ones and told myself I would definitely not need one after this.

A few weeks ago my mom, a friend and I went to Scheels to do some shopping. We took Robs car which meant we were stuck with the shitty umbrella stroller. Halfway through the shopping trip the stroller stopped working. The wheels wouldn't spin we were having to shove it across the floor etc. It was a pain. My mom and I decided I was going to throw it away as soon as I got home. It was a good stroller, it lasted a while but it was done. I threw it away and went out and bought a new $19.99 umbrella stroller. I came home and promptly got in trouble by my husband because we are supposed to discuss purchases with each other. The next day I returned it. Because I had written a check I was given a gift card, that Codi actually dumped out of my purse later that month along with a $100.00 check. I found it funny that after all that with Rob, we were still out the $20.00 anyway. This left us with my beloved Jeep stroller, the nice one that folded small but worked wonky, and the shitty Graco that both kids hated.

Last week when we decided to fly to Vegas I decided we needed two strollers since we would be walking the strip and what not. The Jeep one would be too big in the car so we took the two shitty ones. The second we arrived at the airport I knew this would be a problem as one of the strollers wouldn't move. We pushed on and continued anyway. The whole trip was a constant struggle. We found ourselves arguing over who had to push the shitty stroller, and the kids fought over who got to sit in the one that at least sat all the way up with out having to lay down.

Our second to last day there we went to the outlet malls. My dad got stuck pushing the shitty stroller with faulty wheels. He grumbled about it the entire time a lot of threatening to smash it into walls or just leave it. My mom had located an Old Navy cart with a kid seat and started pushing Brandon around in that. He loved it. I ran to one last store and everyone else waited for me at the top of the escalators. That was when Rob called me asking me why our stroller was left 30 feet away in a corner. I said, "well, my dad kept saying he was going to throw it away, he must have." I was thinking they were just joking around. Sure enough I came up the escalator and found the stroller discarded in a corner. Off they went, my son in the Old Navy cart and all of our bags piled up in the cart portion of it. The next thing I know they had loaded the damn cart up in our rental car and decided they were going to take it home. They also decided they wanted to take it down on the strip with us later that night.

.....

No. I am not kidding, my mom wanted to push around an Old Navy cart on the Las Vegas strip. I explained firmly that I was not pushing my child around in that. They came up with various other ideas, painting it for my aunt to push her dogs in, flying it home to use in Reno, etc. Finally my dad said he wanted to buy a new stroller. I said okay and off we went to Babies R Us. I showed them the $19.99 umbrella stroller I had returned and they dismissed it. Before I knew it my dad was looking at double strollers. They had them all pulled out, they were pushing them and maneuvering them and so on. I showed them all the features of each one (I've done a lot of research on them) and before I knew it they decided we needed this stroller. They also decided they were going to build it right there in the store. The next thing I know they pried open the box dumped it out and wheels and parts went rolling everywhere. My dad and uncle McGyvered it together with a set of keys and a borrowed screw driver (not the right kind). We paid, rolled our new stroller out into the parking lot and were ready to go. Just one problem though.

There was a giant fucking OLD NAVY CART in our trunk. My mom did not want to get rid of it at all. She really wanted to keep it because "Brandon" liked riding in it. Sadly we drove away leaving her beloved cart in the Babies R Us parking lot. Both boys were thrilled with their new stroller. They loved sitting next to each other. I liked that I could recline only one side if only one kid slept. It maneuvers like a dream. I shit you not it steers amazingly. We got home and the very next day loaded it up to go to the mall. Brandon was thrilled to be able to go in the stroller too and not just watch Codi get wheeled around.

So that folks is the story of how my stroller got left in Vegas and I came home with this!

** Please note, the Old Navy shopping cart is not a cart like you would find at a grocery store. I've looked all over the internet for a picture of this thing. It has a cute child seat up front, similar to a stroller with a long basket in the back meant for tossing clothes in it. I'm going to keep searching for a picture of this damn thing though.

**UPDATE!!** Mandy (whose blog link won't work) sent me a picture of the cart my mom was trying to bring home with us, it is the one on the right. Can you imagine if the blog ended with me saying TADA THIS! IS MY NEW STROLLER!

The blanket

Codi's Christmas present from my mom. She made this for him. We went back and forth on themes and finally settled on this one. Make sure you check out the back.

Isn't it cute? It is super soft and Codi loves it! She hand embroidered all of the little squares too! The top pattern is one I loved at the fabric store. The bottom one is actually a swatch from a blanket she saw at Target.

Hello from my death bed (the couch)

Am too lazy to locate computer. Am so very sick. The good sick you know where snot drips freely from your nose. So freely that at one point while laying down snot actually dripped in perfect little drops onto my pillow. Which left me wondering if I should change the cover or just be lazy and flip it. Bet you know what I chose. I also have a rocking sexy cough that makes me pee a little if I cough too hard. My throat is so raw that breathing makes me cough.

Plus eating healthy sucks when you are sick. I stared longingly at my ramen today as I fixed my low. Al low sodium low taste soup.

I tried to take a nice shower but there wasn't enough hot water so I just ended up grumpy after that.

I've spent a large part of my day with tissue crammed up my nose. Codi is being a total shit head though and having a blast pulling it out of my nose. He also bit my nipple with his three and a half teeth today which absolutly did not help matters.

Finaly I'm having a massive case if vertigo right now. So I'm spinning as I type.

So that's where I am. Here I am. Here on my couch feeling sorry for myself.

Sent from my iPhone

They story of the pan

I've got a gazillion things to tell you about Vegas. But until I rest more and upload photos you get nothing but the story of the pan.

First of all, I went to Vegas for Christmas. I did not tell anyone because I always feel weird letting people know I'm gone and that my house is sitting there with no one in it. Back in August at Brandons birthday my aunt and my mom got to talking. They were chatting about Burning Man (you know the big naked boobie hippie love fest in the desert). My mom was explaining how she thought my aunt would love burning man. Since it was only a month away and it would cost a lot for my aunt to come back she proposed a deal. She would go to burning man if we would go to Vegas for Christmas. Long story short, there is an entire photo album of this years burning man I don't want to see and I spent Christmas in a wet and freezing Las Vegas.

I had a few things that were non negotiable for the trip. We had to go to outlet malls, take Brandon to the Shark show and eat at Sweet Tomatoes (my pants still haven't recovered from the food this trip). Finally outlet shopping day came and we spent a ridiculous amount of time driving to Primm Mall. At Aeropostal I got a shit ton of clothes 40%-70% off. At Converse I scored 2 awesome pairs of shoes for Brandon for only $19.99 each (normally $30.00). I hit the jackpot at American Eagle, Lucky and more. Bath and Body Works was a goldmine. Then finally WILLIAMS SONOMA! Most of the store was 40% off. Some even 70% off. However, my favorite part was that the entire collection of All-Clad was 50% off. I nearly died. Here I was on the most limited budget of my life and EVERY SINGLE PAN I ever wanted was half price. I went there for one item only. The 8" non stock fry pan. I call it an egg pan, because it is the perfect size to hand flip an egg in. The pan was originally $89.99 but it was 50% off. The kicker? There was an invisible ding in the pan so they offered me an additional 10% off. That means my $89.99 pan cost $39.95!!! The remainder of the store was on sale also. Let me show you everything else I got and the original prices.

Non stick fry pan $89.99
Professional full size sheet pan $29.95
Professional cookie sheet (mine was smaller) $19.95
Loaf pan $16.00
Pyrex 8x8 glass baking dish $10.00
Extra large spatula $9.00
Christmas dishtowels $7.00
Peppermint bark $26.50
Peppermint Kitchen Candle $24.50

I believe that is all we got, I can't be sure but I know for sure we got this much. The grand total, not on sale is $232.89. With tax that makes it a total close to $250.00. Guess how much we paid? Tax and everything $113.00!!!!! Holy shit batman. We got a minimum of 9 items for nearly the price of my one pan.

Needless to say I LOVE OUTLET MALLS!

Coming later this week, photos of the blanket my mom made. The food of Las Vegas. The malls that weren't discount cheapy ones! Our rad Christmas gifts, and the best ice cream I ever had that I'll never get to have again (hello Fresh and Easy please move to Reno! My favorite story that is coming? The tale of the stroller that is no more!